Don't Hate the Playa....

A King's work is never done. Today I'm going to impart some of my wisdom on a young lady seeking the advice of Tha King. This past weekend my friend, Sex In The City, told me about a situation between her co-worker and a dude she met at a bar. I'll let her tell the story and do commentary. It goes as follows;

Basically she met this guy 2 weeks ago at a bar and they hit it off immediately. Within 1 1/2 weeks they had seen each other 4 times, including on her birthday. They had a lot in common, he asked her a lot about her family and her work, she met his friends, he met hers...........One time he was running late for a date and brought her a bottle of wine to make up for it. In her words, it seemed like things were great and he was kind of nerdy and not her type but she thought she'd take a chance and date the "nice guy."

OK. let me stop here. What in that description supports her claim that he's a "nice guy" can you even make a statement like that after knowing someone less than two weeks? It's quite easy to put up a front for two weeks, believe me I've done it. Back to the story;

So they're on another date on Friday, where they had drinks and met up with his friends at some bar. Afterward they were going to walk to the movies but she invited him to her place b/c it was raining and her place was really close. He made a move while they were watching a movie and one thing led to another and he ended up spending the night. She was completely for it and felt that b/c they had bonded and connected so instantly, she felt comfortable sleeping with him. She said she would normally not rush things but she thought they had connected so well and she wanted to so why not?In the morning he was saying things like i had a great time, you're really great, can't wait to do this again, etc. and then he left on Saturday morning.""He never contacted her the rest of the day, which she found strange b/c he would always contact her whenever they ended their dates or whatever so Saturday night she BBMs(Blackberry Messenger) him and is like hey what's up. He responds and says he's out with friends. She says she's going to this bar (the one where they met and a favorite of his, I guess) and asks if he wants to come. He says he would like to but he can't and she jokingly replies "come on! it'll be fun!" or something like that. She sees that he read her BBM but he never replied and she hasn't heard from him since."

I'd like to first salute this man on another mission accomplished. Likely one of many for him. Sex In The City and her co-worker seem to think that she got "played" I disagree. Giving into to the temptations of someone doesn't constitute getting played. Like it says in the story she wanted to do it. Apparently, based on the amount of attention and "affection" that dude showed she didn't realize that she was gonna be a one-hitter quitter. Probably because she thought she was dealing with a "nice guy."

In reality he was indeed a "nice guy". Nice at getting shorty to think he was out for something other than the box(pussy, for the slangly challenged). Let me make one thing very clear to all females; It doesn't matter if he's nice, an asshole, tall short, skinny, fat, Puerto Rican, Black, a white collar dude or a hood rat. ALL DUDES ARE OUT FOR THE PUSSY, and we'll go to any length to get it(most of the time). You'd be stupid to think that any guy was different. Also, you need to understand how dudes think. We want to hit it as soon as possible, but if you give it up too soon, and a week and a half is too soon, we've lost respect for you and you've lost pretty much all hope of every being much more than a jumpoff to that dude. There are always exceptions, but that's the general rule. I can say with relative certainty that if my girl let me hit it on the first date, it would have been the last date. While I will say cutting home girl off completely is a little harsh, some dudes are cold-blooded like that. Just goes to show you all that nice guy/ bad boy stuff is something that women made up. All men will hit and quit if given the opportunity. Just chalk it up as a lesson learned and keep it moving. Joe Budden addresses the whole situation perfectly;


Ma - you real aggressive, catchin' me of balance
It's a turn off, don't you know niggaz respect a challenge
Move a lil' slow gettin' at me
Treat the pussy like it's worth somethin', don't just go throwin' it at me
Cuz - while you doin' it at the same time I'm thinkin'how many niggaz hit you wit that same line
Or - how many other niggaz you ran game to
How many niggaz you fucked or you gave brain to
How many other dudes houses you done came to
With condoms on you hopin' that he fondle on you
And - I ain't tryin' to catch nothin' from you
So I'm caught up in a Catch-22
If I don't fuck her then I'm not like guys she met before
So while I'm turnin' her down she's just likin' me more
But if I do get to pokin', hit her with long strokin'
I now have a girlie on my hands that's open
I don't want her callin' me constantly
Thinkin' cause I fucked her she got a bond with me
I don't want her misunderstandin' a one night stand
It was just a nut, I'm not your man

Kinda long post but hey, a lot needed to be said.