40 year old virgin

 


 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Everyone loves that movie. It was good, but not that damn good. Just Tha King's opinion. Moving on...Tha King applauds all those people who chose to save themselves for marriage or because of their faith or whatever other reason. If it's good for you than do it. Tha King thinks its a noble undertaking cause you know damn well you wanna do it. Tha King does have a bone to pick however, and its with people....more specifically women, who lie and say that they are virgins and that they are saving themselves when they just had their knees at their shoulders for some dude the night before. Why lie about it? Its a natural part of life people. Besides, 9 times out of 10 a dude can tell if your lying. Girls that really are virgins aren't screaming "I'M A VIRGIN" from the rooftops. This girl I used to date in high school used to swear up and down that she was a virgin, which in turn made Tha King look like a liar because I had told my friends that I was laying the pipe on the regular(I was young). Problems like this can be avoided if you just admit that your f*ckin. Do you think guys really want a virgin? Negative, what we want is a person who hasn't been around the block more than the mailman, not a virgin. A virgin isn't gonna be a freak in bed. We like freaks, (borat voice) they're nice!(borat voice).
 
Now, this isn't the only problem involving virgins that I have. My other problem is the exact opposite. Dudes who ARE virgins front like they're slinging pipe all about the place. If your in high school this is cool, but as a grown man, your a loser. People would have more respect for you if you just told the truth. Again, 9 times out of 10 people can tell. As always; Tha King has a story,
 
My homie, Everybody Hate Chris. Good looking dude, perfectly able of getting females. Dude goes on and on about how he's fu*k ed big chicks, small chicks, short chicks, bald chicks. On many occasions he's told the crew stories of his escapades. Only problem is...WE DON'T BELIEVE YOU, you need more people. Now in this particular case, there has to be some reason why he's not fu*kin, but we can never get to that reason because dude swears he's swimming in pussy. Tha King has tried to grant him immunity and the opportunity to come clean so that I can help him, no dice. I can't help someone who doesn't want to helped, so I guess EBHC will keep spending his nights having threesomes with Handgela and Palmela.
 
Do you guys know anyone who lies about being or not being a virgin? Do people believe them? Have you told them you know their lying or do you plan to?  Tha King will leave you with one last nugget of wisdom: Don't lie on you genitals people. It makes you look stupid.
 
  

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MY BABY DADDY

This topic was so clutch cause Tha King had nothing to talk about today. While at work Tha King came across this story; So I'm sure you all remember hearing about Steve Mcnair, the NFL player who was killed only July 4th by his girlfriend who then killed herself. It was a pretty tragic story, especailly because the man had two sons. Well apparently, McNair's teammate and fellow QB Vince Young has been filling in as Dad where ever possible. This week he surprised the boys by showing up at their school for "Bring your dad to school day."
Black men are always getting thrown under the bus for not being there for their children. Well here's a black man who is there for someone else's kids.
 
It takes a hell of a man to raise another man's kids. Personally, Tha King would have to do alot of soul searching if he were put in that situation. This is the reason Tha King has never dated anyone with children, but the reality is more and more woman are having kids and are single. So this is a situation that alot of dudes are gonna have to deal with. I was at my nephew's football game last weekend(background: my brother and my nephew's mother are no longer together.) His mother's boyfriend was there, just as excitied as if it were his child. Homeboy even skipped HIS nephew's football game to be at my nephews. No thats some shit right there.
 
Anyways, keeping it short today. For the ladies with kids, are some dudes turned off by the fact that your a mother? Dudes, do you date women with children?

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Like fine wine.....

 
Well! Its been an interesting weekend to say the least. Football, Tennis, concerts, award shows. While most of the blog world is talking about Kanye West Tha King decided that he gets enough free pub and I won't be adding to it.(Even though I guess I just did by saying his name, damnit!)By far the biggest news of the weekend however was Tha King's nephew in his football debut. He's a star in the making, just like his uncle.

As always one of Tha King's loyal subjects has come searching for guidance. We'll call her Stony Brook. Stony Brook is a young lady who when dating prefers that the male be older than her. Not an unusual occurrence. Lately she has been unsatisfied with these older men because they have exhibited the same immaturity that guys her age show. In her words. They play the same games. Stony Brook says that it defeats the purpose of dating older men. Tha King is confused. Is that the purpose? Maturity? Ha! Tha King is amused.

Tha King would to make all women clear, the notion that a man stops playing games as he gets older is false. If you play games you play games for life, unless life experiences have made you see the light. The reason you think older men don't play games is because they have perfected their game to the point that you can't see it. OG's is what they're called in these parts. From Tha King's perspective, there are only three valid reasons for women to date older men exclusively;

- Financial Stability: This doesn't matter to many women and its quite possible that you can find a younger dude who is, but more than likely a guy in his late's 20, early 30's and older is probably more stable than an 18-24 year old. Also they know he's gonna kick the bucket soon and all that money will be yours.

-Situational Convenience; Older men are more likely to have children, be married or in a serious relationship. This means if you just want part-time pipe will provide without acting clingy or catching feelings, hopefully.

-Compensation; My daddy wasn't there so now your gonna take his place, most common reason. No chick is gonna bring a dude the same age as her dad around her dad. Not a good idea.
 
For the women that date or prefer to date older men, what are you reasons? For the women that date your age we wanna know you reasoning as well. Guys, are you tired of seeing women your age with these old bastards? Do you feel you can offer everything an older man can or more?  

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I PUT ON FOR MY CITY

When in the course of human events....people like to talk shit when it isn't necessary, Tha King feels it is his duty to step in and defend his home land. Tha King is a King of many things, one of which being Tha King of New York(One of them)As a King of NY I feel that when someone starts talking unwarranted shit about my city I need to respond. Let Hov handle the rappers, I'll handle the bloggers. Which is what I'm doing today. A post was made on a blog today that I took exception to. Not only because of it's horribly bad timing, but also the amount of NY hate that is in it. So here it is, Below I've included the link to the aforementioned blog and Tha King's response, which I also left on the blog. You may notice that this writer also refers to himself in the 3^rd person from time to time, this is purely coincidental;


http://www.verysmartbrothas.com/the-si-most-overhyped-and-overrated-things-about-new-york-city/

THA KING'S RESPONSE;
Alas, I knew this day would come. I have been a silent admirer of the VSB, more
specifically The Champ(Panama be on some next ish), for sometime now. Up until this point I've agreed and with most of the thoughts expressed but a line a been crossed.A New York hate post? I thought you were above that. Instead of reciprocation of the hate I will respectfully respond 5 of your arguments(we hate Rudy as much as everyone else, no argument there)

1. What separates The Notorious B.I.G. from Big Pun is the same thing that separates Jordan from Kobe, he came first. To the masses, who love to unfairly compare everything, Big Pun is just a Latin Biggie, which solidifies his place in hip hop mediocrity.If Pun came first, Big would be the fat black guy trying to be like Pun. Oh, and for the record, Tupac was the more popular and transcendent, but not the better rapper.

2. The Hill district? For Starters, New York was the largest and most well know receivers of Blacks during our migration from the southern states. Black's didn't start moving to Pittsburgh until a decade later. which is why the Harlem renaissance took place in the 20's and the renaissance in the Hill's started in the 30's. If that's not enough for you, I don't recall Richard Pryor and Eddie Murphy starring in "Hill Nights"

3. New Rule; If the greatest basketball player of all time was born there. The best players in the world spend their summers there perfecting their game on it's playgrounds and the best player in the NBA today wants to play here despite the fact that the team is terrible, you are the Mecca of Basketball. That's why every spring your beloved Panthers travel to MSG to play in the Big East tournament. Futhermore, If I take 5 kids from 5 courts in New York I'm willing to bet money they can bust the asses of 5 kids from any other major city.

4. Like I said, on argument about Rudy, but the world rat population out numbers the
world human population. So don't say it's just New York.

5. Your absolutely right, New Yorker's are no more proud than any other people from any other city. The only difference is we don't talk shit about other places, we simply go on(at length) about how great our city is. When have you ever seen a “6 overrated things about (insert city here)” On a blog by a New Yorker?

6. This last one is pretty irrelevant. If the Taliban knew the significance of New York why don't you? They don't call it the capital of the world for nothing.

Lets Work!

I trust everyone had a good Labor Day weekend. Tha King personally loves the short week after a long weekend. It'll be Friday before you know it people! Hang in there. I was listening to the radio over weekend (24 hour mixes, another thing I love about holidays) and they were discussing a pretty funny and very relevant topic. It's funny that they chose Labor day to talk about women not putting in work....in the bedroom. Men's sex game or lack thereof is frequently discussed but rarely do we shine the light on women. It's largely because men are so thirsty for the box that when they get some they're so happy they don't even realize the females sub par sex game. Tha King however is not in drought these days and can now look back on past girlfriends and flings that need to step their game up.

The biggest problem plaguing most women's sex game is what I like to call the starfish effect. This is a big problem with very attractive women who seem think that their attractiveness is enough and the sack and that all they have to do this lie there, much like a starfish.

You get the picture. This is unacceptable. Pu$$y is great, but not dead pu$$y. You gotta work it out, twist it stretch it out bend it, whatever it takes to get the job done. One big thing about sex for guys is perception. You gotta make us think we're tearing it up, even if we aren't.

This brings me to the biggest problem with the females sex game. Oral Sex. I can't think of one female that when asked said they had a sub par or even average head game. The sad truth is, most of them do. If your walking around thinking that your head game is crazy because you do it just like the girls in pornos you need to wake up and smell the spermicide(I know, it was corny, just work with me here.) That's not what guys want. Again it has alot to do with perception. The girls that give the best head are the ones that enjoy doing it, so if you like giving head ACT LIKE IT. If you don't, act like it anyway! Tha King isn't gonna go any further into effective head giving but anyone is in need of tips feel free to contact me. Other common things that plague the female sex game is wack riding and lack of flexibility, any one of these things can really ruin a night of love making.

Ok. Be honest ladies, are you a starfish? Is your head game slacking? Is there anything else you need to work on to get your bedroom game up to par? If so why the hell aren't you doing it? You would want your man to work on his game would you not? Fellas what else do you feel women need to work on?

Red Handed

Turn off the lights......
Light a candle........
That's the only two lines Tha King knows to that Teddy Pendergrass song but we all know what's about to go down. Sex is a beautiful thing.(Sex between two consenting, protected, adults.) Its supposed to be the most intimate moment between you and your significant other. That being said, there is one thing that can ruin your moment in the blink of an eye, other than female menstruation and erectile disorder........Another Mofo busting in on your lovin!

Siblings, Parents, roommates, your other lover, no matter who the intruder your f-session is screwed, and you could be in some pretty hot water. Very rarely can you actually go back to love making once you get caught.(Unless you have a brother like my girl who actually turned around and left the house when he caught us going at it) Despite the embarrassment of being walked in on. It is nothing compared to what it must feel like when your caught "servicing" you self.

For those of you that have never been walked in on. Kiss my ass, you lucky bastards. Don't worry, your day will come. Its a right of passage as a sexually active adult. So here we go people; share you funny getting caught stories. Have a good holiday people. Let's make some more walk-in moments!

*Disclaimer; Tha King advocates safe and responsible sex. Use protection, get tested, and most of all use good judgment.
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The Naked Truth.

Summer is drawing to a close, it seems like they get shorter every year. For Tha King this has been a forgettable summer, hopefully next year will make up provided I make it that long. As you may or may not have noticed most of the topics that Tha King chooses to discuss come directly from the lives of the people close to me. Rarely do I speak about my personal affairs. I'm a very private person believe it or not. I've had this topic in my head for sometime but because it's so relevant in my personal life I didn't want to touch on it. There is a possibility that reading this or your responses could influence the person Tha King cares for the most.(So keep that in mind when responding people) I'm taking a risk, but isn't that what a King would do?

As most of you know from previous posts, Tha King is currently in a serious committed relationship with someone that he loves very much. we'll call her......Cast away(Get it babe?) As of today Cast Away and Tha King have been an item for 21 months by far the Tha King's longest relationship. Tha King was out sewing his royal oats before he met her. So needless to say being in a real relationship was new to Tha King.

Everything was smooth sailing until one summer afternoon while Tha King was in the shower, Cast Away decided to look through the pictures in my blackberry. In doing so she came across some explicit pictures of other females. All hell broke loose.

Cast Away immediately kicked my ass out. Thinking it was a wrap for me Tha King began working on his jab for when Cast Away sent her brothers after me. Luckily after letting her cool off for a few minutes, Tha King was granted re-entry to explain himself. Honestly I didn't think it was such a big deal, some chick sent pics of herself butt ass naked, I thought it similar to having porn. Especially since the girl didn't even live here. Cast Away thought otherwise, she was extremely hurt by the whole situation. Another reason I refer to myself as "Tha King" is because I'm am a King in her eyes and she treats me as such, but now I was in the dog house.

So the question is, given the situation how bad is it to have nasty pictures of friends,ex's, whoever in your phone or computer? Is it considered cheating? Do females get these pictures from guys? Fellas if you see a pic of some dude with his meat out in your girl phone how would you react?