Tricks Are For Kids

There is a disagreement at my place of employment. To set the scene; I am the only male in an office of 8 females, basically it's an estrogen feast in this biotch. Within the last week two of these co-workers have received rather expensive gifts from their male "friends." Both co-workers graciously accepted the gifts, under the impression that there were no strings attached. I felt it was my civic duty to inform them otherwise. The conversation went something like this;

"You do know they wan't something in return right?"

"What?"

"These gifts aren't out of the kindness of their hearts. they want something."

"What do you mean?"

"They are expecting you to give up the ass in the very near future."

"No they don't! We're just friends."

"Riiiiiight make sure you shave your legs and what not for the next time you see him.....

This debate is hardly a new one. There are some men, foolish as they may be, that believe that by showering an otherwise uninterested female with expensive gifts and/or money, that the female will become attracted to you. This is the basis for what we now know as "tricking." Women are aware of this, and under the guise of friendship will string a witless fool along until his accounts are in the negative and his credit cards are maxed out. Of course this doesn't apply to all women, but I can say with confidence that 75% have done, are doing or are willing to do it if the opportunity presents itself.

Tricking causes many problems between the two sexes. From a Females perspective, if she has grown accustomed to dealing with tricks she will begin to believe that this is standard protocol. When a man comes along who's pimp hand is more sturdy, the woman becomes offended, thinking he views her as a "cheap f#ck." To the non-tricking male, a woman who expects her affection to be bought is a gold-digger, and we don't love them hoes.

To the tricking male, his sense of reality has become so distorted to the point where he cannot see signs of a gold-digger. So he writes the female off as "high maintenance" and continues to write those checks all the while thinking that every check that clears is another hurdles he has cleared on the way to her heart, or in her pants, whichever his intention.

Tricking is morally wrong people! A man should not be interested in women that are more into their bank acct than their personality, or lack thereof. Your not the richest dude in the world, so when another brotha comes up to your girl and his bank statement has one more zero, she'll skate. She's not looking for a partner, she's looking for a come-up. Only hoes look for come ups. As women you should realize your playing a game you can't win. If a man has to buy you, your no longer a person. Your an investment, and like cars and houses, pussy is a depreciating asset. Your losing monetary value. As soon as he's able he'll trade you in and upgrade to the shiny younger version.

Letter to Lebron

It was all a dream, we watched you from when you were a boy. You became a man before our eyes. "This kid could be special" we said.

We cheered you as you walked across our stage. We wished you luck as you shook the commissioner's hand. "Your in the big leagues now kid."



Your first game, first dunk, first triple double, we watched it all. We bought the shoes, wore the jerseys. We were all witnesses.



When you came to the Garden we cheered for you. You weren't one of us, you weren't from our city, but we cheered for you. Even though you beat us, we cheered. It broke our hearts but we cheered you.



You said you loved our city, you wore our flag, you watched our bombers. You told us you would love to play here and we believed you. It was only a matter of time. You would be our champion, the King of this city. The A -Rods, Eli's and all else would bow to the return of the King. You would have gone down a legend. Your statue would reside in front of the Garden forever and for all to see. You would be 23, OUR 23.



Then it all changed,



Your taking you talents to South Beach?! You betrayed us. Cleveland would have cut is deep, Jersey would have made us jealous, but you chose Miami, the enemy. You said you wanted to win now. Well to clutch what you covet what must you give away?



You gave away our respect. We were ready to hold court for the King, but you turned out to be just a Jester. You lied, you said you loved this city, you said you were the chose one. Well you chose wrong. You choose to play second fiddle because you knew you couldn't get the job done yourself. Magic would never, Larry Legend was appalled. We want you to be our 23, but your not NY material. King James is now the Fresh Prince of South Beach.



Don't feel sorry for us though,



Although you proved you couldn't make it in this town, a new leader has emerged, Standing tall and talented, ready to accept the challenge of restoring our city to the glory days. His passion has made us believe, his dedication has inspired us. He knows it won't be easy, but we're behind him. The city is behind him, the team is behind him.



Just like he came, others will come. Those that know what this city means to the game. Players have emerged that embody the heart of the city, they are driven by the ballers from Rucker to Roy Wilkins, from W. 4th to W. Farms. There is life after Lebron. It starts tonight at MSG.



Yours truly,

NYC Basketball

Letter to a black girl.

Dear Black Girl,

What have we done to you? Where did we go wrong? Is this all my doing? Did I hurt you like this? What did I do to make you think you had to wear fake hair, fake nails to impress me? What did I say to make you think that I didn’t love your dark skin? Why do you wearing that make up on your face? Did I tell you that you weren’t beautiful? You are, you don’t need a mask from MAC to be. Did I tell you that you had to wear the tightest jeans and the lowest cut shirts for me to notice you? I always notice you. Who told you that your most valuable asset was your ass? Who said you had to shake your ass to get attention? What made you think I wanted you to look like a Barbie doll? Barbie is fake, you are so real.

Why are so angry? Did I do this to you? I don’t want you to be a bitch, I don’t want a diva, I want a Queen, that’s what you’ve always been. Why do you argue with each other and put each other down? You are sisters you’re supposed to uplift each other. I’m sorry I hurt you, I know I lied. I know I told you I loved you than I broke your heart. I was young and a fool. I didn’t know it would make you never trust me again. I thought it was cool to cheat on you. I thought it was cool to treat you like a hoe. I didn’t know, I thought you would get over it. I’m sorry those men touched you when you said no. Is that the reason why it’s so hard to touch your heart? You don’t have to be a freak to make me like you. I always liked you, just they way you were. You didn’t have to change to satisfy the world. I just want you to be who you’ve always been.

With Love,

Black Boy

This post was some loosely inspired by "Diary" by Wale feat Marsha Ambrosius

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jfmiKmUlx6Q

I say loosely because my mind jumps so nothing is ever really inspired by one thing, carry on.

Why Don't You Have A Man? I'll Tell You One Reason Why!

It's been a long time. I shouldn't have left you, without a dope post for your mental. Let me be the first to wish you all a happy turkey day. If you don't eat turkey then....well you should be smacked quite frankly. My apologies for the slight hiatus, I had to get my shit together. I've been observing the foolery that has been transpiring though. Much to discuss we have....

Those that know me know I love to give advice. One because I'm nosey and I want people to tell me their business and Two, it's another opportunity for me to give my opinion. Well last night one of my BBM buddies comes seeking knowledge from the Royal one. She wants to now why she's still single. In fact, most of our conversations comprised of her complaining about some dude that isn't showing interest or how she hates seeing couples because she's jealous.

My advice was typical but excellent nonetheless. I told told her to turn to the Knicks game.

"Why?", was her response

"So we can watch."

" I'm not really a basketball fan."

"So what sports do you watch?"

"Ummm, none. lol"

Aha! I think we have found the problem. It's an issue that single women and cuffed women seem to take different sides on, which is pretty telling if you ask me. The issue isn't basketball, but a unwillingness to interest yourself in in the interests of the person you're interested in. I'll use myself as an example. This week I watched the Bad Girls Club reunion(that bitch Leah is crazy).

Now, let me make this very clear; I HATE THE BAD GIRLS CLUB. I loathe it, I detest it. So why would I sit through the reunion of a show that I can't stand? Simple, because women like the BGC. Since the reunion I have been able to spark countless conversations with the opposite sex by just mentioning that I saw the show. It was a common ground that we could meet at. The formula is as follows:

Women Like X

I like Women

Therefore I like X

Women, single ones more specifically, either don't get this or aren't willing to get with this. Instead of complaining about how much guys love Call of Duty, why don't you pick the damn game up and see what it's about? That way the next time they mention it, you can drop a little nugget of knowledge about the game and spark up a conversation. The same concept is true when dealing with children, if you want to connect with a child, learn about something they like. My mother was able to sit and discuss the Power Rangers with me at length, and we were closer because of it.

No one is asking you to become the next Phil Jackson. Or to log as much Call of Duty time as we do. Just enough to get the lines of communication open long enough for you to switch to some of the sappy sh*t you like to talk about. Is that so hard? Girlfriends do to, maybe that's why you aren't one.

Basketball Jones; 5 reasons you can't miss this NBA season

It feels like Christmas! Another NBA season is upon, arguably one of the most anticipated seasons ever. There's betrayal, drama, revenge, all the things that make you females watch dumb ass shows like bad girls club. This season is just as much about the stories off the court as it is the game on the court. For those who aren't in the know, here are some of the big stories that will be played out over the upcoming NBA season....

1. The Miami Heat; The NBA's super team. This summer Miami hit the jackpot by acquiring the reining MVP of the league, Lebron James and one of the leagues premier big man, Chris Bosh. Bosh and James will be joining Miami's superstar Dwayne Wade. Expectations are through the roof for the heat, its championship or bust. It won't be a cake walk though, the entire NBA is gunning to bring the these guys down. The Heat is on.

2. LA Lakers; The 2 time Defending Champs, lead by the best player on the planet today, Kobe Bryant. The Lakers are looking to do what only legendary teams have done before, 3 peat. One more ring will also give Kobe Bryant a total of 6, the same number is that guy that played in for the Bulls. Can Kobe fight age and injuries and catch Air Jordan?

3. The Boston Celtics; With all the attention on the Heat and the Lakers, the Boston Celtics have been flying under the radar. People seem to have forgotten that the Celtics came within a few minutes of beating the Lakers for the Championship despite not having their entire team. The Big 3( Garnett, Allen, Pierce) plus PG( Rajon Rondo) are healthy now and are playing with a chip on their collective shoulders. They also made a very BIG addition to their team. The men in green are seeing green and are out to get the respect they deserve.

4. Where will Melo Go?; Carmelo Anthony, one of the NBA's top 5 players is on the move. He is in the last year of his contract and has made it clear that he isn't staying in Denver. All the talk is that Melo is on his way to NYC to lead the Knicks back to the promise land, but that's what everyone said about Lebron James this summer.

5. Kevin Durant ; At only 22 years old, Kevin Durant proved this summer at the World Basketball Championship that he is the real deal. Leading team USA to a perfect record and WBC gold. Durant has quickly ascended to elite status in the NBA, amongst the likes of Kobe and Lebron. Will Durant lead his Oklahoma City Thunder deep into the playoffs and challenge the Lakers in the West. Will the scoring leader wins his first MVP award?

Keep your team strong; The 5 people every man needs in his life

Voltron, what a classic. Before I start with today's post I wanted to clear something up for the one or two sociopaths that decided to comment on the last post without reading and fully understanding what was said. I was not in opposition of Spoon abstaining until marriage, I was suggesting that, for multiple reasons, she not let that be known to every males she comes in contact with five minutes after meeting them. What you do with you're body is your prerogative. I don't judge, neither should you. On to the next post...

Contrary to the "born alone, die alone theory," Tha King believes life is a team sport. You can go at it alone, but you're going to lose. Will Smith said that you are the 5 people that you spend the most time with(smart guy), if that's true than I need to get the hell away from my aunt.

When it comes to men, who are expected to have uphold certain moral standards and meet the expectations of countless people, the type of people you keep around you is that much more important. A man needs people that can keep him in check, provide him with perspective, inspire and excite him. If you understand the type of people a man has in his life you will better understand your role in that man's life. I've narrowed it down 5 types of people;

1. The "Old Head"; Commonly known as the father figure, sadly so many men don't have fathers so this role is often filled by an older brother, older friend in the neighborhood. In the worst cases it's filled by a mother. The old head is critical to the growth of a man. He should be one of the first people that the man consults about difficult situations and decision that he is faced with. The old head should be able to give his unbiased, uncensored opinion without any fear of offending the man.

2. The "Young Gun"; The old head gives the knowledge, The young gun receives the knowledge. Again this since the father son relationship is so often not present, a man may take his little brother, nephew, cousin or kid in the neighborhood as his young gun. The key to this relationship is that it has to be mutual consent, you can't be someones old head if they don't view you like that.

3. "Mama"; Or Grandmama, or auntie, or girlfriend who thinks they are the boss. This is the person the man goes to for comfort and security, after a man has made the tough decisions with the help of the old head, he goes to mama for the unconditional love and support. He also goes for that home cooked meal and free laundry service.

4.The Rival; The name speaks for itself. This is the man's antagonist. The person he views as his equal. The rival constantly challenges the man, knowingly or not. The rival pushes the man to demand more of himself. When self motivation fails, the rival, and fear of losing to him(or her) is what keeps the man going.

5.The Muse; This is the person that inspires the man. The muse makes the man want to follow his dream, be a better man, accomplish a goal. Like the rival, the muse often times don't know they are the muse.

Take a look at the men around you and see if you can't identify each of these people in his life. Also take a look at your relationship with that man. Maybe you are one of these people.

Did it all for the nookie

Let me be the last to wish you a happy Columbus day. We owe a lot to Mr. Columbus, the spread of disease, the destruction of multiple cultures. Most of us were just happy to have the damn day off though.

How important is sex in a relationship? Tha King recently met a young lady by the name of.....let's call her Spoon. Spoon and I are both avid sports fans and two of the 20 people that actually watch the WNBA.(Side bar- Did anyone see Diana Taurasi and other athletes posing butt ass naked in ESPN the magazine? If so you should. Fun for guys and girls.)

Rather early into our conversations Spoon revealed that, although not a virgin, she was abstaining from sex until marriage. Naturally I had to question her reason for doing so. Spoon claims that sex is not important to a relationship and that she wants to meet someone interested in her and not her vag.

Tha King applauds the nobility of what she's trying to accomplish, however being the devils advocate that I am. I'd have been remiss not to point out that by taking such a hard stance on premarital sex, she would largely limit the number of bachelors for her to choose from. Why not leave your options open and consider everyone, weeding out the ones only interested in blowing her back out.

Spoon would not budge, she sees sex as merely an form of expressing ones feelings for another and that it can just as easily be expressed in other ways such as "gifts, candle-lit dinners and watching "The Hills" together.(Chuckle) Spoon claims she is satisfied in a relationship with out having sex. "There are other ways to show you care for someone than pounding their vagina for 5 mins." She says.

Needless to say, Spoon and I aren't on the same page. So I leave it up to you good people who had the patience to read this long ass post. Is what is the role of sex in a relationship?