Let me be the last to wish you a happy Columbus day. We owe a lot to Mr. Columbus, the spread of disease, the destruction of multiple cultures. Most of us were just happy to have the damn day off though.
How important is sex in a relationship? Tha King recently met a young lady by the name of.....let's call her Spoon. Spoon and I are both avid sports fans and two of the 20 people that actually watch the WNBA.(Side bar- Did anyone see Diana Taurasi and other athletes posing butt ass naked in ESPN the magazine? If so you should. Fun for guys and girls.)
Rather early into our conversations Spoon revealed that, although not a virgin, she was abstaining from sex until marriage. Naturally I had to question her reason for doing so. Spoon claims that sex is not important to a relationship and that she wants to meet someone interested in her and not her vag.
Tha King applauds the nobility of what she's trying to accomplish, however being the devils advocate that I am. I'd have been remiss not to point out that by taking such a hard stance on premarital sex, she would largely limit the number of bachelors for her to choose from. Why not leave your options open and consider everyone, weeding out the ones only interested in blowing her back out.
Spoon would not budge, she sees sex as merely an form of expressing ones feelings for another and that it can just as easily be expressed in other ways such as "gifts, candle-lit dinners and watching "The Hills" together.(Chuckle) Spoon claims she is satisfied in a relationship with out having sex. "There are other ways to show you care for someone than pounding their vagina for 5 mins." She says.
Needless to say, Spoon and I aren't on the same page. So I leave it up to you good people who had the patience to read this long ass post. Is what is the role of sex in a relationship?
How important is sex in a relationship? Tha King recently met a young lady by the name of.....let's call her Spoon. Spoon and I are both avid sports fans and two of the 20 people that actually watch the WNBA.(Side bar- Did anyone see Diana Taurasi and other athletes posing butt ass naked in ESPN the magazine? If so you should. Fun for guys and girls.)
Rather early into our conversations Spoon revealed that, although not a virgin, she was abstaining from sex until marriage. Naturally I had to question her reason for doing so. Spoon claims that sex is not important to a relationship and that she wants to meet someone interested in her and not her vag.
Tha King applauds the nobility of what she's trying to accomplish, however being the devils advocate that I am. I'd have been remiss not to point out that by taking such a hard stance on premarital sex, she would largely limit the number of bachelors for her to choose from. Why not leave your options open and consider everyone, weeding out the ones only interested in blowing her back out.
Spoon would not budge, she sees sex as merely an form of expressing ones feelings for another and that it can just as easily be expressed in other ways such as "gifts, candle-lit dinners and watching "The Hills" together.(Chuckle) Spoon claims she is satisfied in a relationship with out having sex. "There are other ways to show you care for someone than pounding their vagina for 5 mins." She says.
Needless to say, Spoon and I aren't on the same page. So I leave it up to you good people who had the patience to read this long ass post. Is what is the role of sex in a relationship?
Sex shouldnt be the only thing that the relationship is based off of. I agree with you, she should keep her options because...well its 2010 i dont know she'll find a man that has the patience to wait. Most relationships start because they initially had sex off the break. i also agree that there are other ways to show that you care for someone, but lets get real...how many men are really going to watch the hills with you, and have candle-lit dinners with you if you arent breakin him off. And believe if he is doing that, then he's breakin some other chick off with his goodies. What 1 woman wont do believe there are a million other thirsty chicks that will do it. JUST TO KEEP IT REAL
ReplyDeleteYea I'm not sure if shes being realistic with herself... Its 2010 and I dont know any guy whose not having sex unless they are really religious.. I commend her b/c I was going thru the same thing and just recently.
ReplyDeleteThe role of sex in a relationship is important, but not the MOST important. I respect "Spoon's" decision not to have sex; it's her own choice. This way she doesn't have to worry about sex being the first thing in her relationship. I think she wants a man to love her mind body and soul all in a respectful way. Even thought it is indeed 2010, there are men out there who think the same way. I myself would like sex in my relationship.
ReplyDeleteSex does not make a relationship this is true but it can break one ..those who are not as "experienced" wouldn't know the... difference between good sex & bad sex therefore there opinion really doesn't mean anything (let me just state this having multiple sex partners in your life time male or female does not make you a whore) having a long term sexual partner takes tons of work yes she's right there are other things that make a relationship but who wants to say at 25 or older that there hand satifies them more then there partner? Sex isn't just about busting a nut when your in a actual relationship its a connection its a moment of sharing and opening up to one another & showing your trueself not just "5 minutes of pounding away at a vag" if that's her idea of sex its apparent she hasn't made that connection But when you do its the most fullfilling feeling one can achieve so I state in the short term no sex doesn't mean much but in the long term its should be a crime to take away such a great experience
ReplyDeleteI personally don't believe sex is everything in a relationship- however, its a huge part. I can not imagine being happy with someone when I don't know what their dick feels/tastes/feels like. For me, I need to like your sex in order to be happy with you. If I am not happy with the sex then there is no sense in being with you. Its not so much the actual intercourse as it is being able to be comfortable enough with that person to be on an intimate level. I don't think its a way to show you care or are in love. But a way to completely know your partner in depth. How can you say you are close with someone if you don't know what turns them on physically. And what happens if after abstaining and being with a person for however long, you decide to have sex and it fuckin sucks? Do you stay? Or do you leave and abstain with the next person and hope for the best?
ReplyDeleteI will say that I applaud Spoon for her beliefs, how ever I don't see premarital sex as a horrible thing. I don't think sex is the most important part of a relationship but it is the strongest way of showing your love physically. Relationships that start off as sex I feel aren't really relationships in my opinion either. That's just hookin up with someone and thinkin damn that was great we should stay together and do it some more. I feel that in a relationship, a true relationship, the people will spend time learning about each other and valuing one another before making it a physical relationship. And so the fuck what if its 2010, we also have the highest divorce rate ever right now. In the end it comes down to getting to know your "significant other" first and then gettin physical next and all this can and ,in my opinion , should happen before marriage but never be rushed
ReplyDelete"There are other ways to show you care for someone than pounding their vagina for 5 mins." Maybe she wouldn't feel that way if it lasted a little longer... All jokes aside, what Spoon has set out to do is very courageous. Whatever she decides to do I hope she finds what she's looking for. However, I don't think it's the best course of action. While it shouldn't be the lone deciding factor when choosing a mate, it's still a major one. How are you supposed to know which jeans fit you best w/o trying on a few? All I can say is that Spoon runs the risk of being sorely dissapointed...
ReplyDelete-GO LIGHT SKINNED NATION!!
Spoon's decision is something I've been contemplating with myself to do for some time now, coming out of a 6yr relationship I really want the next one to be a lot more than sex. But like everyone is saying here it is 2010 the chances of that happening is slim to none, temptation is a hell of a thing. But that doesn't mean she or I can't stand our grounds how hard can it be i mean toys works almost as good lol. Rather than wait till marriage I think just stetting a time frame according to how good the relationship is going is a more realistic route to take with this.
ReplyDelete